Raise your hand if you really had no idea what you were getting into becoming a mom.
Reality is always so different from our expectations, and I don’t mean that in a bad way- just in a factual kind of way. Being a mom isn’t easy. Being a good mom is especially not easy. And comparing yourself to others is never going to make you feel better.
For me- the difference between the dream and reality started immediately.
Our first was a NICU baby for 8 days. If you’ve ever had a baby in the NICU you know how hard it is leaving the hospital without your baby. Especially if you’re a first time mama. I cried more in those 8 days then you will ever know. And yet- we were so incredibly lucky that she was healthy- just tiny- and there are SO MANY mamas out there in far scarier situations then that.
Then came the whole breastfeeding thing. BFing is hard as hell. NO ONE tells you that! It’s round the clock, it hurts, and sometimes- no matter how hard you try- you just don’t produce enough.
As a first time mom who has her heart set on BF- that’s a hard pill to swallow. But again- she was healthy with supplementing- and there are so many situations that are far worse.
My first/oldest is wrapping up her first year in school. She is almost done with kindergarten, and it makes me think back to the night before she went off to start that adventure. She was excited- which I am so grateful for. Me? I was a nervous wreck. What if she hated it? WHYYYYYY don’t they have AC in schools in NY?! The temperature was in the 90’s. What about seat-belts on the school bus?! This- from the mama that rear faced her until she was almost 4 because that’s the safest. Ugh. What if she didn’t eat her lunch? This is just the tip of the iceberg.
My point? Being a mama is HARD. Don’t compare yourself to others. It’s not all little arms wrapped around your neck, bedtime stories, flowers picked and “I wuv you.”s
In retrospect, her first year was great!
She made new friends and she came out of her shell. She learned SO MUCH I'm in awe. She is beyond excited and thrilled for her next chapter as a first grader.
If there's one thing I can say I've learned, it's that mamas worry too much.
I know, it's our job to worry.
It obviously comes from a place of love, but these little humans we are raising are SO smart, SO capable, and SO inspiring.
They're far more fearless then we are.
We can learn so much from them about how to view the world.